Stage Fright

My right leg is shaking,
Shaking as though it is the epicentre of my nervousness
Eyes don’t know where to look,
Palms don’t know how much to leak
As thousand hypothetical judgements travel through the air
to lend me my first attack of stage fright
Well…last night in front of the mirror it was all fine,
Three strong points to support my argument
which even Frank Underwood cannot overpower and I am done
Daydreaming in the night
Ohh…I am Hitler, I am Gandhi, I am one of a kind
But that was last night…and to be fair to my introverted-ness
I was two drinks down
But now, as it has attacked me
As I am thrown in the middle of this battleground
I begin with my first argument but suddenly my head switches to Dothraki
With a bunch of uhhs and ahhs in my mouth
I am cursing the teacher who advised me to get on stage
I am cursing myself for showing up today
The only things debating right now are two wills
Will to express or the Will to go back
As this tug of war rages in my head
Heart pounds a million every minute
A look of my friend calms me down
He signals me from the audience to look at him
And nowhere else
Ohh that funny faced bastard
It’s like looking at the mirror yet again
And now words come walking back to my brain
Only to find out they’re too late
It’s already three minutes now
But it’s a great start

Isn’t it? I will be better the next time around

Thank you!

‘Pyaar’ Ka Ek Khat ‘Nafrat’ Ke Naam

Dear Nafrat,
Tum dimaag pe chadte ho
Main dil main utarta hu
Tum apne dhuyein se
Mera chaand chupa lete ho
Phir bhi main kuch nahi kehta
Koshish jab do dilon ko jodne ki hoti hai
Do hazaar saal phele ki dalilein tum aage le aate ho
Samajh nahi paate hain log mujhe
Kyunki bachpan se unhe tum hi padhaye jaate ho
Jaati, Dharam, Rang, Roop aur ab toh Khaan paan (LOL)
Se baandhte ho aadmi ko aise tum
Ki wo ab insaan banne se ghabrata hai
Mere pass aane se darr jaata hai
Par koi baat nahi
Jo pal pal tum tabaah kar rahe ho
Usse pal pal main jod raha hu
Kaise?
Jab ek baccha maa ko janam deta hai
Tab woh maa ki aakhon main bas jaata hu
Ladakpan ki naav main haule se baith jaata hu
Kabhi ‘saat phere’ aur ‘qabool hai’ main meri mahak aati hai
Toh kabhi ek chote bache ki aadhi toffee mujhse milkar
gareebi ki laar mitati hai
Toh aye dost to end it on a lighter note,
Jitne bhi tu karle sitam
Hans Hans ke sahenge hum
Yeh pyaar na hoga kam
Hai Insaaniyat ki kasam….

Jab ‘Paise’ Ko Hua Identity Crisis

Jab ‘Paise’ ko hua identity crisis
Usne pucha khud se kya main bana hu only to fund ISIS
Toh kiya usne introspect
Aur daudaya apna capitalist dimaag
Chalaaye apne socialist haath
Aur bana diya ek flow chart.
Purpose tha mera harr transaction kar dunga fair
But now I’m synonymous with the word ‘unfair’
Seems strange. Right?
Arey sahaab yeh hi toh tanta hai,
Hum jana kahi aur chahte hain
Chale kahi aur jaate hain
Main acche din laane nikala,
Toh Panama ke panno main atak gaya
Aur Jan Dhan khaaton main jaane ki sochi,
Toh Uss daarubaaz bhagode ke saath phans gaya
Kapde bhi badal liye hazaar,
Aur bann gaya ‘2000’
Yahaan bhi ulta padd gaya daanv,
Ek taraf ‘Deshbhakt’ janta line main lagi,
Dusri taraf ‘Swadeshi’ baba ne jebein bhari
Khush ho gaye aam yeh sochkar,
Main (Paisa) yahi ruk jaunga
Par aye meri bholi janta
Phir Swizerland kaun jayega
Sorry thoda zyada ho gaya rona,
Aakhir main mujhe bass itna hai kehna
Na koi galti hai meri
Na koi galti hai teri
Galat toh woh fitrat hai
Jo palat deti harr insaan

Waqt- Ek Makeup Artist

Kitni khoobsurti se waqt chehre ka makeup karta hai

Bachpan ke kit main se choti-choti aankhein nikalta hai

Aur unhe bade saleeke se fit karta hai

Gaal main hansi ke gubaare bhar deta hai

Aur aankhon main zidd ke aansu

Kitni khoobsurti se waqt chehre ka makeup karta hai

Jawaani ke brush se maarta hai mucchon ka pehla stroke

Aur shararti phoonsiyon se chehra lal kar deta hai

Baalon main style naam ki kanghi chala deta hai

Aur aankhon main sapno ki aag bharta hai

Kitni khoobsurti se waqt chehre ka makeup karta hai

Jeevan ke interval main menopause ka chota sa dabba nikalta hai

Aur mehnat kash raaton ke sundar dhabbe de jaata hai

Peshaani par pareshaani ke kuch mote strokes banata hai

Aur ek aankh main gham toh ek aankh main khushi rang deta hai….

Kitni khoobsurti se waqt chehre ka makeup karta hai….

Phir anth main khanste khanste nikalta hai budhape ki peti,

Jhuriyaan banane ka saaman nikalta hai

Adhoore sapno aur rishton se aankhein geeli karta hai

Phir jeevan ke saat rangon ko milakar

Safed rang banata hai

Aur usse dheere dheere chadaane lagta hai

Tabhi toh uski (waqt ki) dukaan bandh hote hi

Chehra ek anokhi shanti se bhar jaata hai

Kitni khoobsurti se waqt chehre ka makeup karta hai

Shake The Dust (My Version) 

This is for the seniors in my corporate world

Shake the dust

For the ones entrapped in the web of EMIs

Shake The Dust

Who work to please the client and not the brand

Shake the dust

This is for the girl

The Drama Queen

Shake the dust

The one for whom I have poured my heart out

But she goes back to the ones who ripped her soul

Shake The Dust

This is for every guy who wants to get in the pants of that girl

Shake the dust

This is for the uncle who steals from my wallet

Even when I give him money every time he asks for it

Shake The Dust

This is for the brother

Who has all the time to party

But is too busy to meet me

Shake the Dust

This is for everyone who bullies me

Not having a single shred of sense

Or ability to understand

What’s going on in my life

Shake the dust

Lastly, this is for the sister

Who left me pretty early

For her heavenly abode

And became a part

Of that dust….

Neend Tu toh Aaja Yaar 

Neend tu toh aaja yaar, 

21 ki umar main samajhne chala hai pyaar, 

Neend tu toh aaja yaar… 

Chhod de yeh jhoot ka vyapaar 

Sapno ki khidki se thoda aage toh jhaank

Neend tu toh aaja yaar

Zindagi ka bas yehi hai saar

Chalta hai yeh safar saalon saal, 

Neend tu toh aaja yaar.. 

21 ki umar main samajhne chala hai pyaar,

Neend tu toh aaja yaar… 

Gilaas

Excerpt from Raseedi Ticket by Amrita Pritam 

“Yeh ek wo pal tha…. Jab ghar main  toh nahi par rasoi main naani ka raj hota tha.  Sabse pehla vidroh maine uske raj main kiya tha. Dekha karti thi ki rasoi ke ek kone main teen gilaas dusre bartano se alag pade rehte the.  Yeh gilaas sirf tabhi utaare jaate the jab pitaji ke koi musalmaan dost aate the aur unhe chai ya lassi pilaani hoti thi aur uske baad  manjh dhokar phir wahi rakh diye jaate the. 

So, unn teen gilaason ke saath main bhi ek chauthe gilaas  ki tarah ril-mil gayi aur hum chaaron  naani se ladd pade.  Woh gilaas bhi baaki bartano  ko nahi chu sakte the,  maine bhi zidd pakad li ki main aur kisi bartan  main na paani piyungi, na doodh-chai. Nani unn  gilaason  ko khaali rakh sakti thi,  Lekin mujhe  bhooka ya pyaasa nahi dekh sakti  thi,  so baat pitaji tak pahunch  gayi. Pitaji ko isse pehle pata nahi tha  ki kuch gilaas iss tarah se alag rakhe jaate hain.  Unhe maloom hua,  toh mera vidroh safal ho gaya. Phir na koi bartan hindu raha,  na musalmaan.”

PS: Kaash itni himmat  mujh main bhi hoti.